Please ignore the previous post...

It's amazing how sometimes the obvious truth is just sitting right there in front of me. And how it's usually a word that reveals it. I'm having a difficult time committing to things right now. My usual policy of wait for it has been turning in to an excuse to do nothing. I am in fact getting lazy. As it appears, I've forgotten how to type.

Quiet Change

I feel I'm loosing ambition. Projects that used to get me excited, are just causing me to yawn. I'm not jumping at opportunities like I used to. It's it a case of "a little bit older, a little more wise" or is it there is something wrong with me? I want to strike out and do something new, but what comes after where I am now is the area of true design and film-style visual effects. Areas I never really intended to go. In all honesty I never thought I'd get this far. So what now? I need to find a new passion in this huge Vis Comm field. I can't say I love it all anymore. I need to choose something soon. That's the big goal now... I need to find a new passion within my field.

I've just felt so aimless recently, I give into the status quo, so easily, I'm feeling very very lazy. Have I really let things beat me up this bad? To the point where I throw ideas out because they are not able to be productized? Am I jaded? Am I disbelieving of whether things will get better? Where is the line between realism and pessimism? All I know is that I can't give up. I've seen how far I've fallen, I need to get back

So I've been running low on blogs recently...

I don't have anything I really want to blog about. Or @ least anything that I'd like to have out in the public. I've mostly been posting in the personal journal, which is little more than a very long .doc file. Journaling is a great practice, I used to think it was a waste of time. I thought this because it never seems to go anywhere. I mean, what's the point of writing in something that no one will ever read?
Well, it's a great way to think things out. Once it's all on paper it's easy to evaluate what I'm thinking objectively. Am I really justified in what I'm thinking and feeling? Most of the time I find myself going through the Psalms cycle. You know, talk about what's going on, then as I progress, I find myself seeing how things may fit in the big picture.

Math...
No thanks to BT and his latest album, I've been exploring some interesting math anomalies. What's really interesting is how they incorporate themselves in geometry and how I've been trying to incorporate that geometry into some of my latest projects.

Joost..
I give this service about an 80% cool rating. It's a great idea. Basically it's a P2P based OnDemand web video service. Once some better content becomes available, this may become very popular. IT also wouldn't hurt to add some live feed content and more 16:9 support. Oh yeah, and some better codec usage couldn't hurt either. What this service does do well is GUI. This thing is very sexy!! I'll post some screen caps soon.

I think that's it for now...

New Technologies....

Okay so I did it!!!! I finally, bought an HDTV. Here's the lowdown on one of the niftier toys out there.

1. HD does look amazing! However you really only get to enjoy it a percentage of the time. The only time you have Full HD signal "over the air" is national newscasts, prime time, and most sporting events.

2. The signal is only as good as the source... Rule 2b of video production. Most of the time what you get is upsampled 480i. If it's a digital source it still looks good, if it's off an analog tape...not so much.

3. I don't know if it's just the model I bought or what, but DVD looks really really good. Mind you, the pixelization is still an issue, but the contrast ratio is out of this world!

4. It makes for an awesome computer monitor! Yagi is now permanently attached to the HD system. That'll make races a little more interesting, no?

5. Over the air Dolby Digital is nice.

6. Joost, need I say more?

Here's a thought...

Why do dems support a withdrawl?

What happens if the US and Iraqi Forces succeed?

Deceitfulness of Wealth

The one who received the seed that fell among the thorns is the man who hears the word, but the worries of this life and the deceitfulness of wealth choke it, making it unfruitful
Matthew 13:22

I recently took some time to catch up with some of Rob Bell's sermons. One of them was about, among other things, the deceitfulness of wealth. This is something I don't really think about all that often but it's something that I deal with. Just when I think I have it dealt with in one area of my life is sneaks into another area. The deceptiveness is that little voice that says, "If I just had a little more...". I know that more is not better, any one who knows me, knows that this is very important to me. But over the past few months this attitude has been finding it's way into my mind. I don't need more stuff, and I don't want to store stuff up, but I've found myself doing both recently. Agh!

Here's one of my recent inspriations...

Mr. City Men

This is a great set of amazing animations. Very very enjoyable.

what is this?

Well, the fog I've been under for the past few weeks is beginning to lift. It looks like this is going to be a cycle that needs to be prepared for... odd. Anyway, as always this period is usually capped off by some unexpected surprise, and God does have a sense of humor, and he's laughing at me right now, and to be honest I'm laughing along with him. In this world there are a number of things that I was convinced didn't exist, this week I met one of them. Best of all I will have the opportunity to work with them. I finally have a real teammate at work.

Feeling better...again.

Today is the last day of client hell... for this week at least. I'm just hoping that we will see a return to normal soon. Then again, "normal" recently has been client hell. So yeah, take it however you want.
American Idol thoughts...
Last night's episode was the first one I've actually fully enjoyed in a very long time. Probably since Chris Daughtry's last performance. There is hope for this season after all. Just one more week then the REAL show begins. I was kinda scared last night when my sister got me to list all the winners and the runner-ups since the show started. And Simon still rocks.

drained...

you know it's bad when you get totally drained within 2 hours of getting to work...the past few weeks have sucked beyond reason. I need a cave to crawl into for a while :)

Later that day...
Sometimes it's amazing the little things that get me through the day. A stuffed Cookie Monster and Supertones Strike Back did the trick this afternoon. Go fig! I'm so weird.

Oh yeah, I've also started watching SG-1. Season 1 is kinda interesting so far, very much a pilot season. But I am beginning to get into the characters a bit. Though they do seem a bit cardboard like at this point. Oh yeah, geek moment here, I'm working on a stargate texture effect...he he, all I need now is the green screen and a willing accomplice. I'm sure I can find a quality 3DS model of the stargate somewhere. Oh the challenge :)

Things are returning to normal...

I haven't done a blog on Yagi for a while... might as well. For those who don't know Yagi is my project/gaming computer. For those who don't care, just skip this entry and do something more important.
Over the weekend I upgraded Yagi's Hard Drive (with a little help from Chad). This was a much needed job considering I was using a 6 year old 40 GB drive. The new one is a 250GB SATA drive with a 16MB cache. The load times have improved greatly and the drive also sets Yagi up as a video editing system. This really is the last step before an overhaul (unless I'd like to set up a second drive on a RAID). The next upgrade will have to be a processor, motherboard, RAM, and video card all at once. I'm expecting to be able to do this around June this year. But with all the news of IBM/AMD and Intel's latest advancements I may need to wait a bit longer. Advancement is moving SO FAST!!! It's hard to choose a point to buy at. I pick a processor generation then within a few days a new mouth-watering improvement is announced.
Right now the Core 2 Duo looks best, but a Dual X2 system also seems tempting. However an AMD Quad Core may be worth waiting for. The Intel Quad is cool but it seems a bit pricey and First gen is never all it can be. Just look at my Athlon64 3200.

Interesting...

I'm feeling a surprising level of peace right now. I just looked out the window, and instead of thinking, "Oh man, I've got to brush off the car AGAIN!" I thought, "wow, that's looks really neat". The whole day has been like that. It's been a little weird.

But I noticed something again today, tell me if I'm wrong. It seems that the purpose of the media is to instill panic and fear. And when it's not doing that, it's trying to convince us we have no right to feel good. I mean really here, do we really need to know the latest thing that may or may not kill us? Do we really need to be convinced that tomorrow will be doomsday? Should we be convinced that the lessons of yesterday have no application to the future unless they have something to do with failure and/or misery?

It's good to know what is going on in the world, but there MUST be some good out there? I'd hate to think that the only diversion from the harsh world is sports and entertainment. That's another thing... why do we need entertainment news? Is celebrity all that important? Why should the morals of a sociey be implied by an elite controlled by the PR gods? People and Sports Illustrated... is there a difference?

Now all has been heard;
here is the conclusion of the matter:
Fear God and keep his commandments,
for this is the whole duty of man.
For God will bring every deed into judgment,
including every hidden thing,
whether it is good or evil.
Ecc. 12:13-24

Amen

So why did I post Super Grover?
For nostalgia mostly.
Grover was my favorite Sesame Street Character.
And Super Grover was as good as it got.
For those who have seen that Sesame Street Special thing at Metropolitan Muesium of Art
Well all I have to say is "Max" and you know what I'm talking about.
Ah childhood!

151st post

Life continues to get more interesting... I'm making breakthroughs on the family tree. Too much information sometimes. I was hoping to dig as far back as I could, but I've been caught by a story my great great grandma and grandpa. It's really interesting, I just wish I could flesh it out a little bit more. I love nothing more than a great story.
Other than that I'm feeling kinda stagnant. I want completely new challange, nothing to do with anything i've ever done before. Learning new video software is getting old.

Uh yeah, might as well keep it up!

Blah blah blah, not much to say, right now. Lady In The Water was a good movie. I will be buying it. I expect it to be in the 9.99 bin soon enough. It's nice to see a film maker making films for themselves and not some pre-determined demographic except the one that likes a good story.

Aonther good move I think everyone NEEDS to see. Secondhand Lions! I know it's got this "family friendly" rep, but seriously, this move is one of my top 5. Again it's a good story.

In the same catagory is Chocolat, this is another NEED to see movie. I just love the message, and the twist is one of those things that really hit me when I first saw it, and it still does. Actaully there about 4 or 5 twists in it, like any good story.

ANOTHER movie everyone needs to see is Saving Grace (the one made in 1984). It's old, it's imperfect, it's VERY hard to I find, but it could be considered one of the best "Christian" films ever made though it probably isn't considered Christian. And it is in my top 3 favorite movies. Again it's a good story. BTW I built a DVD of it if anyone wants to see it :)

more piles!

only 2 cups of coffee to get started today...wierd.

So, I've managed to get back to the posting on a somewhat daily basis. There isn't much more going on, this is the new year and as with all Januarys and Junes I have alot on my mind. Like how am I going to dig myself out of this hole? It's a common one. Specifically, when dealing with others. I wish I could get into the details of this issue, but it isn't exactly blog approriate.

On another semi-related topic: Sometimes I need to ask why I'm wired the way I am!
After nearly 25 years it still doesn't make any sense! That's why I was born when I was, if it was any earlier I'm certain natural selection would have kicked my ass.

HOLY SH**!

Over lunch today I decided to catch the feed of the Macworld Keynote. I was expecting appleTV, very cool device, it would look good with the Wii. Now there's meeting of the minds that I'd love to see. Anyway, then there was the iphone. I had my doubts, but I was converted instantly on the first photo. What Apple has made is the device of my dreams. Audio, Video, Internet, and phone all seamlessly integrated. Multi touch control, NO BUTTONS and a unified sexy design. I WANT one NOW! This is the reason I haven't bought an iPod yet! This is what I've been waiting for.

How's this for a title?

Okay so the title is a little cheesy, but I found it witty for a moment.

ANYWAY, I may be tapped for my first freelance After Effects job soon. Very exciting! And if it does come through it will be for a MAJOR company. Like, if I told you who it is, you would KNOW who it is. I'm sure all ya'll have shopped at one before. More on that as it develops. Apparently my name is beginning to float around Milwaukee, eep!

Later that morning...

Back before Christmas, I was given a little daily Sodoku calendar. Who knew it was going to be such good day starter! Coffee and a puzzle, it's a great way to start a morning! Aside from all that, I continue on my normal day. I even have a scheduled show for today! Big W007 there!

The weekend was okay, I spent most of Saturday working on "mask tweening" at Ridgewood. It's like doing chroma key by hand. It would be easier if I could do it on a Cintiq. Not that would be a dream, After Effects on a Cintiq!
It was kinda nice working @ Ridgewood again, I like that mac system a lot. Yuki has her share of issues (kinda high maintenance), but in the end she is still a stable system, capable of some amazing stuff in the right hands. I just need to get a new VCR in there so I could have a real-time monitor again. I'd also like to clean up the station a bit. make it a little less "Office" and a little more "Editing Suite". But that's all down the road... IKEA run anyone?